TIPS 4 THE COACH (Part 9)

Giving Feedback

• Demonstrating how to perform a procedure improves your skill level--but does nothing to improve the coachee's skill level. So spend more time requiring the coachee to demonstrate his or her skills and provide appropriate feedback. (ST)
• The coachee is likely to be her or his worst critic. So begin your feedback session by asking, 'What did you do that makes you feel positive and proud?' (ST)
• Instead of singling out one individual in a group who needs improvement, find another person in the group that individual works well with, and enlist the aid of the other person to deliver the comments or encouragement needed. Many people find criticism easier to take if it's not from the teacher. (Kaye Vivian)
• Be open to receiving feedback on your coaching. The best coaches learn also. Model the 'best practices' of receiving feedback (it might just be a test). (Jane Koroniak)
• Describe why the skill/behaviour (etc.) is important. Outline the steps/expectations/objectives/outcomes involved Demonstrate or model what is required. Catch the coachee doing something right. Measure and Incent. (Elaine Allison)
• If a client is resisting a request have him/her look at the value they are receiving from resisting by asking, "By not doing what you said you were going to do tells me that you're receiving some value in resisting, what might that be?" or "I'm sensing some resistance here, what would you rather be doing?" (lou Russell)
• If you observe the coachee doing something in an ineffective manner, tell them so, ask them to analyze the situation, and then to report back to you, including a description of the ineffective behavior and what they might try differently in the future. (Rebecca Lopez)
• Provide encouragement and support each step along the way, giving feedback when appropriate to help build upon each success, no matter how small. (Katie Root)
• Whenever a coachee claims that his or her failure was due to bad luck, gently explore alternatives. Through appropriate questions, convince the coachee that the failure was due to lack of effort or the choice of an ineffective strategy. (ST)
• Whenever a coachee claims that his or her success was due to luck, refuse to accept it. Through appropriate questions, convince the coachee that the success was due to effort, ability, or the choice of an effective strategy. (ST)
• In order to make progress, a coachee must be able to identify incorrect or poor performance. After a task or activity, ask the coachee to evaluate his or her own performance. This will help you determine if the coachee recognizes areas that need improvement. (Doreen Brady)
• Use the coachee's self-evaluation to begin the process of setting goals for the coaching process. (Doreen Brady)
• If a coachee self-evaluation does not identify areas that have improved or that are strengths on which to build, be sure to discuss them and offer praise. (Doreen Brady)
• On giving feedback: Use the 1-1-1 method. (Not sure whose this is.. but I got it from another trainer) Give them one "I like", one "I wish" in one minute. For instance: I like how you answered the phone so quickly. I wish that you would have used a little friendlier tone of voice. (Susan Williams)
• Praise, praise, praise! Even if the person being coached bombs completely, find something positive to say that will give them an anchor to hold on to. No one likes to fail. Help people to fail with their dignity intact and they will take away a positive learning experience. (Kaye Vivian)
• Sometimes a big warm smile, with eye contact, and telling the other person, "I know you are going to come up with a great solution!" is all the motivation and help they need in order to shine. (Kaye Vivian)
• Ask for help. Request coaching help and feedback from your friends and co-workers. But impose suitable constraints. For example, my writer friend says, "Here's my rough draft of an article. I don't want you to proof-read it. But can you read it and tell me if you thinks this could be an article you'd enjoy reading in Parade Magazine? I just want a simple answer without any details." (ST)

TIPS 4 THE COACH (Part 8)

Framing the Coaching Process.

1. 'Coaching' is an inappropriate term because it is frequently associated with dysfunctional behaviors of autocratic sports coaches. Use some other positive term such as 'co-creation' or 'problem-solving partnership'. (ST)
2. Read the book, Difficult Conversations: How To Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen (ISBN 0-670-88339-5). Although this book is not directly related to coaching, the concept of mapping the contribution system (figuring out how everyone contributed to the present mess rather than attaching blame) has significant relevance to the coaching process. (ST)
3. Coaching is related to several other organizational processes including change management, team building, facilitation, performance management, and strategic planning. You can acquire many coaching tips from these other processes. You can also position your coaching session as a part of these other processes. (ST)
4. Here's one of the differences between mentoring and coaching. Mentoring focuses on the relationship while coaching focuses on a specific task. Make sure that your coaching conversations focus on some specific task to be accomplished. (ST)
5. Affirm the best for any situation. Make "win-win" a "self-fulfilling prophecy" (Jill Andrews)
6. Coaching is based in the belief that people want to and can do a good job. If, down deep, you don't believe that, coaching is probably not for you. (Ken Coleman)
7. Coaching is not a one-sided initiative. It is a dialogue, a give-and-take, a sharing of ideas and information. The coach does not have to be the initiator of the process or even any given conversation; the coachee can sometimes take the lead. (Kelly Taliaferro)
8. Coaching is not therapy or taining or consulting. Each has its appropriate time and situation. Spend some time learning which is called for in what kind of situations. (Ken Coleman)
9. The most useful coaching is situational. Consider the difficulty of the task being coached, the skills and experience of the person you are coaching and their preferences in terms of how much 'help' should be given. Sometimes people don't want/need 'the answer', they need a little assistance in finding out how to get the answer themselves. (Jane Koroniak)
10. The prerequisite for coaching is a basic trust in the coachee and confidence that he or she wants to improve. (Bhatia Samir)
11. When coaching a team, assess early whose input is critical for the group's success and whose is less so. Follow up throughout the project with all, but if deadlines are missed or problems arise, you'll know where to focus your greatest efforts--on the important contributors. (Kaye Vivian)
12. There is no single way to coach all the people in all situations. In this list and in various books on coaching you will come across inconsistent and contradictory tips. Instead of asking yourself, "Which tip is right?" or "Which tip is better?" ask yourself, "Under what situations and with what types of coachees will this tip produce useful results?" This will help you become a more flexible, versatile, and adaptive coach. (ST)
13. Be sure that everyone in a group you are coaching has an assigned task, with a deadline and a deliverable. Provide a structure for the overall project, but then stand back and make yourself available to answer questions or be a cheerleader, as needed. (Kaye Vivian)
14. The coach of a group should avoid taking on any of the tasks needed to accomplish the project. By staying outside the tactical execution, the coach can stay objective and help the other team members to achieve their goals...and the overall goal. (Kaye Vivian)
15. Encourage peer coaching. At the end of a training workshop, invite participants to find a partner for implementation activities. Set up a system for these peer coaches to encourage, support, motivate, assist, console, and collaborate with each other. (ST)
16. C.O.A.C.H. stands for these five steps: Connecting with the coachee. Observing his or her job performance. Assessing the performance to select a high-ROI area for coaching. Conversing with the coachee about performance-improvement ideas. Honing the coachee's competencies. Your job as a coach is not complete until you have completed all these steps. (Gabrielle)
17. Remember the line from "The Philadelphia Story" (Kathryn Hepburn says it): "The best time to make up your mind about people is NEVER." (Alain)

TIPS 4 THE COACH (Part 7)

Establishing Credibility

1. Admit failure. Model a key component of lifelong learning by being honest with your own performances and using them as an opportunity for learning. I saw a teacher of mine make a huge mistake in class, and rather than lose his cool, he used the experience as at teachable moment on recovering from errors, and spontaneity. (Kurt Squire)
2. When you do not know the answer to a question, admit it. Offer to find the answer and provide it at the next coaching session (or sooner). (Doreen Brady)

TIPS 4 THE COACH (Part 6)

Demonstrating

1. Be willing to "lead from example." Be an exemplar, and model the desired behavior. Do not expect the participants to do something you can't do in front of them. Do it flawlessly. (Norm Gustafson)
2. If the subject matter is knowledge or information that supports performance, demonstrate how it can be learned. Also demonstrate how it can be applied to their specific situation. (Norm Gustafson)

TIPS 4 THE COACH (Part 5)

Dealing with Reluctance, Resistance, or Defensiveness.

1. When coaching an employee or team for some type of performance improvement, make failure less threatening and success more personal by taking Peter Drucker's advice (roughly paraphrased): "Don't concentrate on polishing your skills. That will take care of itself if you seek to eliminate the constraints that impede you from achieving your stated goal. Using this approach, the focus of your effort becomes external to yourself, reducing the notion of a "personal shortcoming." (Peck)
2. Don't assume that the coachee's statements are signs of resistance, reluctance, and defensiveness -- just because they are different from what you want him or her to say. Use these statements as genuine and valuable indicators of unfilfilled needs or unexamined causes of performance problems. (ST)